champagne or salmonella?

I quite agree with Lattedrinker about the Chairman and his braces and cannot think of anything to better it. I do feel ,however, that awards for sheer heroism should also be awarded. From the audience perspective the ham and tomatoes were quite fresh as Doris in 'Fumed Oak' claimed. By Saturday they looked a very sorry sight, despite all the best resuscitation techniques from the S.M. The loaf of bread needed turning to hide the growth of mould showing to the audience in the front rows. This had been very apparent from Dress Rehearsal, probably a penicillin culture in the making. The cast need medals for carrying on with the script in the face of such odds. To be able to deliver such lines as 'What's wrong with it?' and the response, 'I don't know yet' about the ham, without turning a hair should go down in CADS legend.
Although Doreen never had to look at her nemesis, I would award her top prize for behaviour above and beyond. By Friday the remains of the three takeaway meals into which she had to stick her hand had developed blue furry mould.On Saturday the SM and Props peeled the lids off at armslength. Warned about it, Doreen, 'without showing a morsel of fear', declared that she would shove her hand into 'the brown sauce one' being the least lethal of the three and did so. Wow!